Thursday, December 9, 2021

Memory work


A couple of weeks ago I bought a painting. It's very Maud Lewis-ish, but I like it. I have another painting by the same woman, I told the saleslady that when I bought it. She said the artist will be thrilled to hear that someone out there is actually collecting her stuff.

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First major winter storm last night coincided with doctor's appointment first thing the following morning, necessitating getting out early to shovel snow. Not a fun time. On top of that, last night I was sifting through paperwork trying to find something or other and while I never did find whatever I was looking for, I did find the receipt for having paid the last installment of my property tax and noticed for the first time that the low income seniors rebate had not been applied to it. I then hunted for evidence that I had in fact applied for the rebate, and found none of that either. Not even a form that had been left unfilled and undelivered, just nothing.

So after the doctor appointment I trekked over to town hall to see if they had any evidence that I had applied for it and of course they did not. As the clerk said, they would have applied it if I had submitted the form. Well, I knew I was suffering from brain fog and memory issues, but this was one expensive memory slip. Sometime back in the early days of the pandemic I had requested that my bills be emailed instead of mailed, and that went okay for the first year but in the second year I was late paying two bills because I forgot, and I never applied for the tax exemption. I requested to go back on paper billing, so much for saving trees. The clerk muttered that she could never do online bills.

My doctor suggested that I get my memory tested, there's a local company doing some kind of study of dementia and looking for people to do memory testing on. My doctor doesn't think I have dementia but it might be useful to see how much the CFS has affected my memory. She also recommended a couple of other things which I asked her to write down for me otherwise I would never remember them. I've already forgotten what they were, but I have a piece of paper that she wrote on!

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I am not recovering very well from my mini-vacation, there seems to be way too much stuff to do to prepare for winter and I am not sleeping well. The bout of snow shovelling this morning has flattened me, I spend way too much time in a recliner. I have books to read but no energy to pick them up.

I was joking with someone else who has insomnia, we were talking about our evening "cocktails", how every night we look at an array of pills and herbals and whatnot and try to guess which combo will work tonight. So far, I am not guessing very well at all. 

I received an email last night from a friend who said she hoped I was more relaxed now, that got my back up. I fired off a reply saying relaxing was not my problem, imagine having a bad 'flu for months/years on end and maybe that would convey a little of how I feel. Saying that to her feels like crushing baby bunnies, I know she means well she just misses the point. But I'm tired of it.

Okay, I remember now one of the things the doctor thought I should do: apply to get CBT-I (cognitive behaviour therapy for insomnia) at the regional hospital. And get my blood sugar checked, I am apparently now in the "pre-diabetic" range. Still can't remember the final thing, or at least I think it's the final thing. Good thing I have that piece of paper … somewhere.

2 comments:

Wisewebwoman said...

I totally empathize with what you are undergoing, particularly with well meaning friends. My two years of sickness resulted in unconscious weight loss (I avoided eating as much as I could as I would literally go blind after a meal). Friends would tell me how marvelous I looked and wonder what diet I was on. This, when they all knew I was barely mobile and so very sick. I stopped even talking to them about my health as it was a 747 situation, obviously. Fine became my response to the inquiries.

I do hope you get sorted health wise. It is always such a worry and particularly your insomnia.

XO
WWW

ElizabethAnn said...

WWW, invisible illness sucks. I have one friend who has something very similar so we commiserate every once in a while. Everyone else I don’t really expect to understand. Since I have a diagnosis and there is no cure and not even a generally agreed treatment plan, I am trying to get used to this being permanent. Saying goodbye to my old life. Which is I guess the name of the game when you are old, anyway.